Winchester-Nabu Detective Agency Year Five:
Case File No. 46-254
AMBER LOVE 28-MAR-2022 Find out how all this began. Catch up on Year One, Year Two, Year Three, Year Four and previous Year Five cases at the Winchester-Nabu Detective Agency.
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Where We Left Off:
The Winchester-Nabu Detective began a case file on a grackle named Quigley. It appeared that Quigley was searching for a lost object.
The Bonnie Parlor Story:
The last mouse that Gus and Ollie caught was one of the most notorious criminal rodents in history: the one and only Clyde Burrow! We believe the subject of today’s case file may have information.
Gus and I had around two hours outside exploring and observing critters for our investigations; Oliver had a little stroll. Gus was well-behaved (not always the case). The real excitement began after we got home.
It was broad daylight. All I was thinking about was food and comfortable clothes. My routine is to put down my camera bag, take off Gus’ harness, hang up my jackets, parasol, and hat; then usually sit and take off my gaiters and boots. This particular Sunday was unpredictable.
I had put down my camera and some of my things like my adventure bag, parasol, and hat and removed Gus’ adventuring accessories. But when I turned to enter the kitchen to make up the plate for Gus’ lunch, I was stopped dead in my tracks! I had one foot in the kitchen and looked down to see a brown mouse not moving but upright. I thought, Is it dead? Would it still be on its feet if it’s dead? Why isn’t it running away? But what I said was, “Oh. Hi.”
The house mouse hadn’t moved. I slowly backed out and turned my head side to side looking for anything that could be used as a temporary containment unit. My coffee bar was to my right but I knew we didn’t have any empty cans there at that time. Nothing on the side board to my left. I turned around to the tables and found a tulip-shaped candlestick. I reached for it. By the time I had it in my hands, Gus detected something going on – plus he always ends up in the kitchen after an adventure (usually after a trip to the litterbox).
I turned back around and entered the kitchen when Gus swooped in ever-so casually and picked the mouse up. He immediately trotted around the house and up the stairs to the offices and my bedroom. He acted like it was perfectly normal to walk into the kitchen and find a mouse waiting for him. He thanked me for my small part in finding the squatter and took off.
Thus began our chase (insert Yackety-Sax here) which I recorded. The other voice on the video is The Cook who thought I should let Gus take the mouse outside. Then I would have to chase a naked Gus around. Gus had expended his energy by point from being outside for so long even though we took it easy. It was still a long time for him to be alert and tracking things with his Super Smeller. This indoor chase could have lasted much longer. I had a decision to make: grab Gus or go for the mouse. I should also mention that at this point, I thought the critter was dead. It showed very little signs of movement in its head when we arrived in the bedroom. I had also pulled off my gloves at some point probably to use the phone’s camera.
I felt my inhale fill up my whole chest cavity and held my breath. I reached out hoping Gus wouldn’t run. He pulled his head back. I used my thumb and index finger to pinch the poor mouse’s tail and I held on. It had to be painful for the little critter. I think all the pain was why she was barely conscious.
Ugh. Then the worst part. Gus and I were in a tug-of-war with the mouse! I think his bottom fangs had a strong clench on its belly. Those fangs scraped down the mouse’s soft squishy underside while I pulled and won. I had custody of the critter and quickly loaded it into the official relocation transportation unit. I made sure I didn’t trip over Gus on my way back downstairs to show The Cook that this incident was almost over.
That’s when I noticed. I held the jar up to examine the critter’s injuries. I noted the bald leg. I don’t see how Gus could’ve done that. He didn’t have time to play with it. He only snatched it in his jaws and ran. He didn’t have opportunity nor the time to do that kind of damage to the mouse’s leg. I was still thinking it was dead when I saw the belly expanding and contracting! The mouse’s eyelids were closed. Its mouth wasn’t gasping, but I had. I could not believe my eyes. It was still alive!
Since this critter was sporting some severe injuries – or perhaps already recovering from injuries if that bare leg was from a previous scuffle – I didn’t feel the need to walk it far away for relocation. I carried the transportation unit to the fairy garden. Again, I expected to dump the mouse out and see the body give in to death’s embrace. It did not! This survivor stumbled yet zipped through the weedy ground to reach the cinder block wall!
I wanted to offer some nourishment to this victim. I was right in front of the blocks where we routinely drop peanuts for underground residents of the fairy garden. I picked up an old pumpkin stem and used it to reach in one of holes for a peanut still in the shell. I cracked it open and offered it to the mouse. At first, she seemed like she was going to devour it, but then she put it down and climbed onto the blocks of the wall. I guess she was more determined to get the hell away from me than in eating a delicious meal. She threw herself over the edge of the wall and landed like a superhero on the ground. All this is in the video. It felt like the right time to bid the little creature farewell and good luck.
Case Findings:
After the capture and release of the kitchen mouse, I wouldn’t let Gus and Oliver take their naps until after we had a meeting to discuss what had happened. Who was this brave creature in our kitchen? I was in a huge surprise.
The Super Smeller and Oliver’s thorough research indicated that brave brown was a lady! The injured leg was the clue that cinched the case. Bonnie Parlor was in cahoots with Clyde Burrow, of course. We knew that, but we never expected to catch her. She was living under the name Parlor rather than her married name since she ditched her husband ages ago. She took the name Parlor because she liked the space under the Winchester-Nabu living room which offered her easy eavesdropping opportunities.
Oliver learned from another informant that Bonnie had suffered a terrible leg injury. This somewhat explains why we found the mouse with a previous injury. There were various rumors about it, but we haven’t substantiated any one as fact.
Needless to say, we have now released an injured Bonnie into the wild. Will she return to the place she felt the safest or will she go off and find Clyde? We may not know the answer to that, but we now know who this mouse is and why she was in the kitchen. She had been living out her retirement years here.
Case Status: Closed
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Founder and Editor-in-Chief of AmberUnmasked.com and Vodka O'Clock Podcast. Author of The Farrah Wethers Mysteries, comic book short stories, prose, and non-fiction. Cosplayer and figure model.